That Dirty Word Submission.

I always find the debate about submission interesting.

“You only submit to your husband”

“You have to submit during a relationship so a man can see that you are wifey material”

“Submission is degrading”

Most women these days aren’t having it at all. Submission has become a dirty word. I watched a reality show recently where a man talked about how he would like a woman with an element of submission to her. The women laughed and walked away. She was offended. So these days if a man talks about how he wants a submissive women, he might not ever see her again.

Let’s be real, submission is not a new concept. It goes back to the to Bible:

Ephesians 5:22-24 – 22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

What we like to forget is that it says “wives” and that the Bible speaks about the husband’s role too:

Ephesians 5:25-28 – 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

I find it funny when the new age or millennial man speaks about wanting a submissive wife, when they are not willing to be that husband that is described. The real question is, do men have the capability of being a husband and head of the household? Taking care of their wife and children? Leading their family into to purpose and prosperity? Because a man like that doesn’t have to worry about finding a women who is submissive. She will easily follow if she knows she is safe and cared for.

Women these days get criticized for being “too independent” which makes them appear to “not need a man”, but how else are they supposed to be? The trash is not going to take itself out. The bills have to get paid. These are not the old days of a couple marrying young, the man working and the woman staying home to take care of the household and children. Men and women have become equal. To be real, it’s becoming, (if not already there) unequal because women are working more than men. Because of this, women hold it down until someone is willing to take the burden off of them. And even after that, women are naturally nurturing and are designed to be helpmates. So the quality of submission will be there. Men don’t have seek or ask for it; when they display leadership qualities, a woman like that is naturally drawn to them.

The trouble is, submission is not properly defined. Submission is not slavery. It is not a bad thing or idea that the women has no will of her own. It is an understanding that men and women both have strengths and weaknesses. During a woman’s time of weakness, she will follow the man’s counsel. During his time of weakness, he will do the same. Honestly, in a healthy relationship or marriage, you are submitting to each other in someway. You both seek each other’s advice and put each other’s needs in consideration. So submission is not this strange, old, one-sided concept that we make it out to be. Submission is not limited to the woman. Submission is “the action or fact of accepting or yielding to a superior force or to the will or authority of another person”.

Person.

Dear Future Husband

I’m seeing the dear future wife/dear future husband hash tags and posts everywhere on social media. Some people take a humorous approach to it, some think it’s cute to do, while others like myself believe in it. For me, it’s not meaningless. I am actively speaking into existence the things that I want in my husband. I am actively praying for him whenever the mood strikes. It’s because I believe in him. I believe that he is somewhere out there actively looking for me. Praying for me. It may sound crazy, but that is what faith is about. Speaking to the unseen. Speaking about things as though they are.

So if a spouse is what you desire, pray for them (to show up) and pray for them (their well-being).

Do not be ashamed of what you desire. If you want to be married then speak it. Put it into the atmosphere. Pray about it and believe it will happen for you. Don’t fall into the statistics and reasons why it can’t happen for you. If that desire is in your heart, it was put there and it will be fufilled.

#love #hope #faith
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Closed Doors.

I remember a few years ago, I interviewed for a position within my company that I thought I would be perfect for. I aced the written test and did great at answering the interview questions, so I thought the job would be mine. Unfortunately, my coworker got it instead. I cried, I screamed, and acted like a total brat after I got the news. A few weeks later that same coworker was complaining about how difficult the job was and that there was only a small increase in pay. She quit after only working a few months. I found myself thanking God that I didn’t get it.

We never know what God is blocking us from.

Just because we feel like we should have certain things or even someone, doesn’t mean that it’s best for us. Thank goodness god sees the bigger picture. We should seek God in all things and ask for his protection daily. We may not realize it, but His will and purpose is much greater than ours.

#love #hope #faith

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How About I Just Marry Myself?

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My sister Melissa and I had a great conversation about this story last night. It can be found here: http://madamenoire.com/506085/houston-woman-marries-herself/

A 40 year old woman (which is not old by the way) decides since she is single with no prospects, so she is going to marry herself. Some say she was desperate. Some say she was bold and showed self-love. I say she gave up.

When I thought more about this, the story of Sara and Abraham came to mind. Sara laughed at God when she was told that she would have a baby at her old age (Genesis 18). She even chose to move in her own effort by allowing Abraham to impregnate their servant Hagar, because she believed she was incapable of having children. Even through her moments of doubt and devising her own plans, she still conceived a child just as God had promised.

So guess what? Even when you try to move in your own effort (like give up on love and marry yourself), you can still receive the promises God meant for you to have.

Why would he put a desire in your heart without providing a way to fulfill it?

May you never lose sight of the vision God gave to you. If you want to be a wife or husband, it will happen. If you want to have children, it will happen. Find the scriptures that coincide with the desires you have and meditate on them each day. Hold on to your faith and the promises that were given to you by any means necessary.

#love #hope #faith

Left Behind.

Just look back at who surrounded you and who you spent your time with last year. Are they still there now? For me, people I loved, people I believed would remain in my life forever, suddenly left. Unexplainable, unexpectedly, just seemed to disappeared.

I tried to chase, tried to beg, tried to hold on, but my efforts made no difference, they were gone.

I didn’t understand and sometimes I still dont, but I know it was God. I know He has greater plans for me and the places he has set for me to go, some people cannot come. So sometimes He has to tear our world apart and move people out of our way. It seems cruel and unfair, but He knows who belongs in our lives and who doesnt. Don’t fight Him when He starts shifting.

#love #hope #faith

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Abraham. Jacob. Boaz. Christ.

I love the story of Jacob and Rachel. Jacob loved Rachel so much that he worked 7 years for her. And even after being deceived, he worked 7 more years just to have her (Genesis 29). Although this is a story from the Old Testament, it applies today.

Ladies, if a man really wants you, there is nothing on this green earth that will stop him from pursuing you.

I believe men are natural born leaders. They have God given instincts to be protectors, providers, and persuers. Now of course you have some that have not tapped into that instinct, but when a man truly knows who he is and seeks the Lord, he is able to become all those things. He knows what he wants and will do whatever he has to do to get them. And if you are on his list, you will become one of his priorities. There will be no excuses. So if you have to chase him down, he’s not the one. You are worthy ladies and if you’re worth it to him, he will show you. He will lead, fight for, protect, and love you without hesitation.

#love #hope #faith

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Faith Needs Works.

James 2:26 – “For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also”.

Works can be interrpreted in several ways, but for today let’s look at it as preparation. When you ask for something in prayer, not only should you believe you will receive it, but you need to expect it. I will use myself as an example.

I want to be a wife and a mother. I have prayed about it and I truly believe in my heart that God will release him to me. So as a single woman, what do I do in the meantime? I prepare for him and my future children. It can be as simple as learning new recipes or keeping a clean home. Anything that will benefit my future family, I need to start practicing now.

What about that new job you want? Should you just continue to pray for it and wait for something to fall in your lap? No! You have to send in applications, revise your resume, and prepare to do the duties of the job you want. God will open a door to you, but you have to knock on it first.

Get in preparation for the vision that you’ve been praying for. Go beyond the faith of a mustard seed and get ready. Pray for it and prepare for it. #love #hope #faith

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